innovators

Myth: Failure Sucks.

candle

 

When we start out on projects or attempt something we have never tried before, we always believe the myth of failure. We fall into the trap that failure will kill us, we won’t go on, and it will be the end of our dream. Throughout life we hold back on taking chances because the chance of failure is a hit to our ego. What will people think if we fail?

 

But, in reality, the most important question is what will we think of ourselves when we fail? How will we choose to live with it?

 

I will share something with you, this is a secret, so let us keep it between us. Because, just like I said before, what would happen if people found out I failed at something 😉

 

I set up a webinar series to teach self-love to women and men. To give them the tools to start or continue their journey of learning how to love themselves. Last week, I had my first webinar series and I was so nervous. I was almost shaking and my nerves were at an all time high.I had never been this nervous for a workshop. I guess maybe because I had never done anything on the internet before and I was putting myself out into the world to be judged and criticized.

 

As the night came, I had only two people join the webinar, one of which being my mom. But, the show went on. About 37 minutes into my presentation, the internet cut out and wouldn’t reconnect. I was devastated and humiliated. Thank god, the audience was so small. After allowing myself to feel disappointed for a few days, I was back at it again planning and preparing.

 

Last night, I decided to try again. I was ready. I was prepared. I wasn’t nervous. I felt like I could take on the world. I got on 30 minutes early to set up and practiced over and over again. It was one minute before the webinar began and I closed my eyes and took a deep breathe reciting everything I was about to say. As the clock struck Eight,  I opened my eyes…

 

Number of viewers: 1, my mom. Thank god for my #1 cheerleader. I pictured everyone who had signed up speeding down the neighborhood street, throwing up the door, fumbling with their keys, throwing down their bags, and impatiently waiting for the modem to kick on and their slow computers to start as they were panicking they were late to begin their journey of self-love. But, I only felt patience and understanding as I waited for other attendees to join the webinar.

 

Thirty minutes later, still, no one. It was a party…my mom and I. Was I disappointed? Of course, a little bit. Was I sad? You bet ya, a tad. Was I ready to throw myself a pity party? HECK NO.

 

What I realized in that moment was, I had a few choices. I could feel sorry for myself, feel bad for all the effort I put into this, and take no one showing up personally OR I could use this as a chance to perfect my message. I could use this as an opportunity to grow, to learn, to evolve. What did I learn? I need to learn marketing. I need to better appeal to my audience. I need to find a way that will work. Because it will. It just isn’t supposed to right now.

 

Because here is the thing about “failure”: We can let ourselves believe it is a failure. We can let ourselves get slowed down by the challenge and obstacle or, we can let it catapult is forward. We can let it empower us and excite us more.

 

As I sat there talking to my mom for almost an hour, she was her wonderful self showing me support and optimism. And as we hung up, I told her, “Hey Mom, you know what will be great someday? When the day comes where I am on Oprah’s Super Soul Sunday or Ellen and I will say, ‘I remember my first webinar series, the only person that came was my mom and now, I am selling out stadiums.’”

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The Possibilities and Sleepless Nights

You know those sleepless nights you like awake as your mind races through what could be? The endless possibilities your life has in store and the dreams that are waiting to come true?
You lie there as excitement, nervousness,  fear, and doubt do the tango through your thoughts and your mind jumps from one scenario to the next. How? What if? What could be?
Everything is stronger at night, whether it be hope, possibility, doubt, or fear. Your eyes are tired, but your heart is full as you think of the excitement life has brought you. And you have more excitement for what is in store.

I always dreamed of the innovators, geniuses, and world changers over the centuries receiving their brilliant thoughts and projects during their sleepless nights contemplating possibility. Their hair a mess with bedhead, in pajamas, putting their pen to paper, at their most raw and vulnerable point of the day. I guess there is a romance in the silence of night as others dream and knowing you are awake making your dream come true. I always prayed that my life be used in a similar way, however intricate or grand it is supposed to be.
I want to sleep. The waves are soothing as I hear them crash outside of my window. My bed is comfortable, but as the sheets are tangled and my mattress is exposed, it look more like a warzone rather than a peaceful spot to rest. But tonight, thinking of the potential I have and the projects I am working on keeps me laying here with my eyes open. I ask for divine guidance and inspiration to write and work. And, of course, they come in the middle of the night. The clichés and stories have always warned me of that, but I always thought they were exactly that, clichés and stories. Add that to the list of things I always thought, “would never happen to me,” but have and continue to. I decide to surrender to the adrenaline and flow of excitement as the ideas flow through me as effortlessly as water pouring from a faucet. I live for these moments. When these moments happen, I try to be open, willing, and grateful. Because these ideas are more important than the hours of sleep I miss out on. I believe the power of these hours spark revolutions, movements, and world changing transformations.
So, here is to the brave souls, the movers and shakers, the inspiring and hard working entrepreneurs and their sleepless nights. Let the possibility of greatness always keep you going. May your passion and enthusiasm lead your success. And throughout it all, may you fall deeply in love with yourself and believe in the power of your dreams and possibilities. Because there is only one of you, the uniqueness of your dream, and only your once-in-a-lifetime-way of offering it to the world.